This is the first of four installments from a national collective – the Belonging Initiative. Organizational members include the Canadian Abilities Foundation, the Canadian Down Syndrome Society, Independent Living Canada, the Laidlaw Foundation, L’Arche Canada, the Marsha Forest Centre, PLAN BC and the Plan Institute.
John ’s heart is aching. He never expected to find himself living without Mary, but her sudden illness and quick death left him struggling with depression and loneliness.
He relied on Mary for most things and now finds it difficult to connect with his only son David who lives in the same community, but has had to make work his top priority in these difficult economic times.
John belonged to Mary and now she is gone. John covets people to spend time with, to care about, to give his life meaning and in turn he desires people in his life who he can count. His doctor told him he should get out more, but where? John was not keen on attending the local seniors’ activity program.
John wasn’t interested in accessing public services. His doctor helped him remember that in their youth he and Mary did a lot of hiking. Why not join a hiking or walking club? John broke through his inertia and signed up for one hike. This was a first important step for him in building a caring circle of friends to whom he belongs.
Like John, we all yearn to belong. In fact, belonging is at the heart of our health and well-being.
Extensive research demonstrates that we are healthier and happier and better equipped to cope with life transitions and traumas when we enjoy the benefits of a network of caring family and friends. We live longer and lead more productive lives. We thrive when we belong.
Sadly, this feeling of belonging is eluding more and more of us. Our personal networks break down as we age and our family and friends age, and we encounter traumas such as life threatening illnesses, job losses, as well as separation and divorce.
We must return to the essence of who we are and carefully build and nurture lasting intergenerational relationships that we can count on throughout our lives. In this regard we have common cause with others in our community who for a variety of reasons are isolated or alone.
In British Columbia, leaders from diverse organizations including the Vancouver Foundation, the Dalai Lama Centre for Peace and Education, CanAssist (University of Victoria), Community Living BC, and the PLAN Institute have committed themselves to making belonging a priority for policy makers, across all health and social service sectors, and all levels of government, and funding bodies. The initiative proposed is called
Better Together and is in the early stages of implementation. Immediate priorities for action include the following:
Celebrating Langley’s
You Gotta Have Friends and create toolkits and resources to assist other communities make belonging the heart of their neighborhoods and communities as is emerging in Langley.
Hosting a National Festival for Belonging to showcase our yearning to belong as human beings together with caring best practices that will help us all find home and the abundance of belonging. In addition, innovative social financing tools will be profiled as sources of revenue for establishing and sustaining belonging initiatives.
Creating a Belonging Bond where investments in the Bond will be used to fund
Better Together projects in communities across BC and Canada.
Promoting Tyze, an online assist to connecting people into personal networks.
If you are interested in learning more or getting involved, or for a copy of the concept paper that describes the
Better Together Initiative, contact me at
rsyme@uvic.ca or
nford@plan.ca.
Robin Syme is a consultant to PLAN and the PLAN Institute for the Better Together work to date.